


By the Ganga

by Selenophile_forever



Category: Shubh Mangal Zyada Saavdhan (2020)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Comfort/Angst, Deleted Ganga Kiss Scene, Deleted Scene, Ganga Kiss, HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY🥺, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mild Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-12 02:08:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29627481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Selenophile_forever/pseuds/Selenophile_forever
Summary: The Deleted Ganga Scene we all deserved but never got :(
Relationships: Kartik Singh/Aman Tripathi
Comments: 7
Kudos: 10





	By the Ganga

**Author's Note:**

> HAPPY (late) FIRST ANNIVERSARY✨🥺  
> This film really changed me into a much better person. It made me so much more confident and made me realise so many things. I can't believe it has already been one year, truly. It feels like yesterday that I sat with my family to watch the film. 
> 
> To Hitesh Sir, thank you so much for creating magic through the film.  
> To Ayush/ Jeetu, thank you for agreeing to the roles and giving us not one but various ships. thank you for changing lives.  
> I owe you'll so much🔅
> 
> And now, to all the people of the fandom, I love you. Thank you for making my life so much better with every fic, fanart, edit and everything. Each one of you made my days better and for that, I shall forever be grateful to you guys. I've never been any happier.  
> I made wonderful friends here, every one of who, means so so much to me. And all these friendships and moments are what I'll cherish till the end of my life. You're the best people I know.  
> "cute as a button, every single one of you🥺"

Aman kept on hearing Kartik rant and yell at him for agreeing to marry Kusum but he knew Kartik had the right today. He didn’t want to get married any way but he was tied up. He felt like running away with Kartik. Kusum had a lover yet she was marrying Aman for her motive.

Aman hated how everyone had their motives in life, everyone was selfish here. And then, for Aman, there was Kartik, who only had love to give. And expected only love in return. Nothing more and nothing less. Yet Aman failed. He couldn’t love Kartik as much as Kartik loved him. 

Yes, Kusum and Aman had plans. Yes, they would get married but not maintain it. But what if Rakesh ditched? Aman couldn’t just leave about Kusum, his mother had taught him better values. It was all very complicated. All so very unjust to him. He had been crying since the night before. Every time he thought he could cry no more, more tears fell. Just like now, he was vulnerable and like always, it came out in the form of anger, and on Kartik.

Kartik had been repeatedly calling Kusum with wrong names and Aman would correct him every time. What he didn’t know was whether Kartik was doing this on purpose to show his hate towards the girl or there were chances his mind wouldn’t catch Kusum’s name because he had half a brain cell.

Aman saw Keshav come and stand behind Kartik, wanting to say something. Kartik must have noticed Aman’s drifted gaze because he turned to look behind. “Keshav?” He asked.

Keshav nodded. He flashed a bright smile and spoke, “Bhabhi...She is ready!”

Aman noticed Kartik’s eyes flare. “It’s Kusum! Her name is Kusum!” He snapped at Keshav. Forgetting the name was done on purpose. Aman wanted to laugh at his boyfriend's behaviour. Keshav just nodded and ran away. Aman turned his face away from Kartik not having the courage to look at him.

Kartik stomped his foot on the ground in frustration and slipped to fall. Though Aman had heard the thump, he let it pass pretending it was unheard.

  
  
As Aman and Kartik were the only two people left on the terrace, Aman shifted his entire focus on the Ganga that was visible from his house. A place filled with numerous memories. Kartik was still on the ground when he looked at Aman and called to him, “Aman!”   
  


Aman was too lost in the serenade of The Ganga and Kartik’s voice was unnoticed by him. Kartik calls out a second time, this time louder than the last, “AMAN!!!” Aman takes a look at Kartik but doesn’t say a word. Aman’s behaviour unwantedly pisses Kartik off.

“I am hurting right here. What’s the ego that has got into you?”

Aman was as if lost in the Ganga somewhere, purposely blocking out all the voices because, at the moment, everything hurts him. He was supposed to be married off to a girl in another couple of hours and he hated it. Given a chance, he would pack his bags and run away forever, but he knew he couldn’t do so. His family still meant the world to him. A part of them would always be etched in him.

Kartik makes attempts at standing up on his own but fails and falls back to the ground groaning Aman’s name. “AMANN!!” It was funny how Aman’s name was exactly what came out. He was always his. They were meant to be. Always. But things change. Things happened.

  
Aman turned at the sound of his name being called in pain. His neck sharply turns to look at Kartik. He sees blood, a sight he had always hated. It was gross. And a nice amount of blood on Kartik’s elbow didn’t do much help right now. He runs towards Kartik to help him. The dramatic ass Kartik that he was, he moved behind a few inches.

Kartik speaks in a low raspy voice, “Let go, Aman. It’s of you use anymore. You should go away. And maybe...maybe forget the ‘us’ even.” Kartik keeps a finger on Aman's chest right where the heart was.

“Believe that we weren’t real. What we had wasn’t real. It will be better, maybe. I guess...Guess maybe, that night Chaman Chacha should not have left until I sat on the train. Maybe...should...I shouldn’t have returned.” The words fell off his mouth more rudely than he’d expected them and he regretted it instantly, but the way he was hurting both physically and mentally, he didn’t turn away.

Aman tried to move towards Kartik but got stopped. Kartik, who had managed to stand up, was about to trip on the stone again, but, luckily enough, Aman doesn’t let him. Kartik stays in his arms for a few more seconds not wanting to let go, just yet. But then he does, steadies himself and turns away.

Aman manages to speak, “Kartik, why are you leaving? Stay awhile, please.”

He was teary-eyed by this time but hadn’t let a single tear fall. Kartik turned around to look at him. The beatings from the day before and the blood from the trip make him dizzy and so he stays back, sitting on the bench beside him. Aman sits beside him and lays a hand on Kartik’s, mimicking their first date. The difference? The date was not painful. They hadn’t said a word yet and as much as Aman had loved silence more than words, today, all he wanted was for Kartik to shout and play around like the goofball he always was.

It was more difficult to accept the fact that Kartik Singh was the goofball only around Aman Tripathi, and Aman Tripathi was leaving. Breaking all the promises they had made together. He cursed in his mind. He hated himself for doing this to Kartik. Only if he could reverse time.

“Aman, can we go to the Ganga, please,” Kartik speaks in a low voice, his eyes glued to the Ganga. “You’ve always told me your many stories. I want to go to your favourite place once with you.”

Aman nods, agreeing to take Kartik to the Ganga sometime soon. He looks at Kartik And says, “Soon. For sure.”

Kartik vigorously nods a no and Aman smiles to himself happy to see the baby Kartik he was used to seeing around. Kartik speaks again, “I wanna go right away. Who knows what comes next? Who knows if we exist or not.”

Aman was shocked at the words but knew Kart ik wasn’t wrong. He notices Kartik making the puppy-look he would always make. “Please?”

Aman finally agrees to not disappoint Kartik any further, as he was already doing so by leaving him. Aman smiles, “Let’s, then.”

Kartik happily gets up, but the smile not reaching his eyes like it usually did. He stumbles and falls in Aman's small arms. The reverse was a common phenomenon back in Delhi, he remembered. They stable themselves and walk away from the house, hoping to forget the past few days and going back to the older themselves, even for an hour if that was.

Leaving the house from the back door to reach as soon as possible and not get stopped by any of the family members, the boys soon reach Ganga. Aman had numerous memories here. The first swim, first near-drowning experience. Few hours of his birthday would be spent here with no one irritating him with the same old blessings and same old wishes. Aman and Goggle had been here after her first heartbreak for hours. This was the same place Aman had run after his first fight with his mother. A place of most firsts. 

And right now, he was here, for the first time with Kartik. This fell good, especially with their hands entwined, Aman felt better than ever.

Kartik had seen pictures of the Ganga, read articles, heard Aman’s many stories but right now, standing right there felt so beautiful. He would cherish this moment forever. Everything felt perfect to Kartik until he remembered who Aman was going to be married to. He freed his hands of Aman's hold and avoided eye contact and looked at the Ganga again.

Aman’s eyes shifted to their now far apart hands in shock. He tried to get hold of Kartik’s hands once again but was shoved away. He saw fear in Kartik’s eyes. Tears welled in his eyes again. How much did he hate this feeling, oh!

From the blurred vision, he sees- not clearly but is sure of it- more tears. More tears of Kartik. More tears of sorrow. Kartik would never hide his feelings. Never. Not from Aman. But right now, it scared Aman. Scared him because Kartik was hiding the tears. Hiding his emotions. Aman saw Kartik wipe his tears away.

With the heaviness in the heart and the lump formed in the throat, aman tried to speak. With a little hope of being able to take away his pain a little. Aman knew that was next to impossible right now, but would he not try? He would. For Kartik. He took a deep breath and began, “Kartik?”

Kartik turned to look at Aman. He tried not to break down befo re Aman. He didn't want Aman to be unhappy on his big day. ON HIS WEDDING DAY! He didn't want to be the one to cause Aman any issue. At least today. Or ever henceforth. He replied with nothing more than a ‘hmm?’

Aman sighed and continued, “Why are you behaving so weird? Why do you keep hiding from me?”

“I am not. I am standing right here in front of you!”

“Yeah, sure, This is a joke too,” Aman huffed. “Kartik, how do you manage to joke around even when things are as serious as this?”

“Aman, I am used to it! To soak in the pain. Who knows maybe I joke around to hide from the pain. To run away from it," he laughs at his joke. Which he soon realised, Aman hadn’t found funny.

Aman moves closer to Kartik trying to make things seem as normal as possible. Kartik moves away.

“Why do you do so, Kartik? Do you hate me now?” Aman asks in a brittle voice. Kartik laughed, no sarcasm, no feelings right now, just a laugh that held nothing but emptiness.

He moved his body to face Aman and looked right into his eyes, “You’ve taught me to love, not hate. I can never hate you, even in a billion years!”

Aman lets out a relieved sigh at the words. “So, then, what’s all of this shit? You don’t wanna talk to me, you’re hiding the tears from me, do you think I don’t notice? You’re...you’re trying to get...get away from me?” He hated how shaky his voice sounded and hated how Kartik could notice it.

Kartik doesn't speak for a few seconds but when he does, it feels no less than poison. It feels more than hundreds of arrows pierced in your bodies to Aman.

“You are getting away from me!” Kartik points fingers to both their hearts and continues, “By leaving us behind. By leaving everything behind. You decided to get married. Fine, do it your way. And, then, I hope you stay happy with the girl. After ruining not one but three lives, I really do hope you stay happy.”

“Aman Tripathi, I do wanna talk to you, a little too much, but I know, if I try talking, I’ll spill every emotion and then leaving you would be so much more difficult. Both, for you, as well as me. I hide all my tears from everyone because that’s what men are supposed to do, aren’t they? But you were the first to look at those tears without judging, you were the first to understand the meaning behind all the tears, you were the first to wipe them away in true sense. And then never let them spill. And even if they returned on those nights where I was my weakest, you stayed.”

“But, today they don’t seem to stop because I know it. I know that you won’t be there with me hereafter. You won’t be there like how you used to be. And no one will ever be.” Kartik let out the breath he had been holding so long.

  
  


“And leaving you? That doesn’t even cross my mind ever. I’d prefer dying over having to leave you. But I see the circumstances changing, Aman. We have to let go of each other. We have your dad here, the villain of the story, Ambrish Puri. I accept being weak in front of him, because he is your father, Aman. Not everyone has one. I can’t fight him.  _ Kyon ki Amitabh Bachchan bante nahi, hote hai bas _ . And I am not any Amitabh Bachchan so yeah, we get to face the consequences.”

Kartik didn't realise he had started to tear up once again. He soon did though, and blinked those tears away. He had no power to wipe them now. He had no power to do anything. He knew somewhere he was going back to the same dark pit from where Aman had brought him out. He was going back to being the timid, shattered child who ran away to save his life. He would be the old, broken Kartik Singh again.   
  


Kartik shakes his head in disappointment, “So, yes, I’ll go away. I’ll catch the first train back once I see you on the horse, once. Then, Kartik Singh would no more be the pain in the ass for Aman Tripathi.”

Aman was stunned. Kartik never ran away. Why now? But he couldn’t blame Kartik, could he? He should’ve known better how much Kartik was hurting.

“You aren’t a pain in the ass. Kartik, stay back. Please,” Aman pleaded, even though he knew it was of no use.

“I can’t, not any longer. I don’t have it in me to see you getting married to someone who isn’t me. You are no more exclusively mine, but I shall always be yours and only yours.”

Aman was as much Kartik’s as the other way round and Kartik saying those words were like arrows to Aman. “So, what do I do? I cannot stop the marriage, Kartik. I want to but I just cannot.”

Aman let his tears lose.

Kartik raised both his hands to cup Aman's face, finally not shying away from any touch, which helped Aman relax a bit. It was their sign of affection that would always help both of them. So much like an “I love you” but so much more meaningful.

Kartik said whilst looking straight into Aman’s eyes to let him know he was saying the truth and he meant it, “I know, love, I know. Don’t flinch. Do it. Do it for your parents.”

Aman, who had not been able to meet Kartik’s eyes all this while, looked at him shocked. Devastated even. “What are you even-”

“Yes, Aman. Just forget me. Please.”

Without caring for anything else when Kartik could no longer hold himself back, he pulled Aman closer to himself, embracing him in a tight hug. Tightest of all the hugs they shared. Because Kartik Singh wanted the last hug to be the most memorable. The last hug should bring Aman's scents to his body and it did. It surely did. Aman wrapped his hands around Kartik too. He knew this was their last hug. And he didn’t want to leave Kartik. He wanted the moment to last forever. But he knew it couldn't.

Aman let go of the embrace and looked into Kartik’s eyes and then to his lips and then back to his eyes. He tip-toed to match Kartik’s height. His eyes darted to Kartik’s lips one last time before he pressed their lips together. He couldn’t care less about the world this second. He also knew Kartik would be shocked, just like the kiss a couple of days ago at Goggle's wedding that eventually broke. But then, Kartik reciprocated almost recreating the last kiss they had shared. 

He felt Kartik deepening the kiss and he complied. The kiss was steamy, passionate and yet soft and light as a feather. Aman bit Kartik's lower lip making Kartik moan and giving him entry to the mouth. Aman proceeded, pushing his tongue and playing with it. Kartik wasted no time to mirror the move. He did the same and the kiss grew more intimate. They held onto each other for support and continued the kiss.

Within the next few seconds, Kartik broke the kiss hastily. He moved away from Aman. He was quite far from his lover and yet took a couple of more steps behind. He looked down to his feet, fidgeting with his red jacket. The pain of the beatings the day before returns to him but with more force this time added with guilt. He finally found the courage to look at Aman. A look of shock, pain, confusion and yet love, was passed to Kartik.

Kartik took a deep breath and steadied himself. He already was out of breath due to the kiss they had besides the holy Ganges. The purest, untainted, devotional kiss they had. And the most beautiful with Ganga showering them with love and blessings. He remembered Chaman Chacha's words when Aman and Kartik had shared a sudden kiss at the wedding 'Sakshat Prakriti ka roop hai yeh!' It felt divine right now to be able to share the kiss at the Ganga. Which would be Kartik's favourite kiss ever, and also their last.

When Kartik was able to form coherent words, he spat the words, “Aman, this is wrong! You’re getting married. This shouldn’t be happening. I shouldn’t have done this. I am sorry, Aman. I am sorry. I am... I am wrong.”

Saying those words, Kartik ran away, not even looking at Aman for the last time. Kartik didn't know why he did so. But he couldn't do anything else. He felt like a curse, like a sinner, a sin right now, exactly what his father had called him, years ago. He wanted to run away but he would wait. Wait until Aman rides the horse before his wedding as his promise said. He kept running like how he had run away from his house years ago, until he reached Tripathi's house. He went inside wanting to not recall the last hour. But fate had plans different from Kartik’s.

Aman, on the other hand, stood by the Ganga replaying the last 15 minutes of them at the Ganga. He replayed it but his tape stuck at the last minute. 'This shouldn’t be happening. I shouldn’t have done this. I am sorry, Aman. I am sorry. I am... I am wrong.' Kartik's words kept playing repeatedly until it was irritating. Kartik felt guilty and it again was Aman's fault. He did all of this.

This time when the tears fell Aman couldn’t take it anymore, he sat down, fell and cried. Cried till his throat, eyes, body felt sore. He failed them. He failed everyone. He cried for him, for Kartik. For them. He broke down beside the Ganga, which felt like an oxymoron because it was the Ganga where he would find peace as a kid whenever he felt low, or had cried. The Ganga would make him smile, but today was different. Aman kept weeping. He cried. He cursed. He went numb. Cried till there weren’t any more tears left.

Two lovers were separated, broken that evening. Both cursing themselves. Both weeping. Both hurting. But none who had the courage anymore. Both accepting the fact of forgetting the beautiful life they had planned. Both vulnerable. And both in their worlds believing the evening as their last evening to exist. 

But if the Ganga had blessed them, she would save them too. Maybe, this would be their life's hardest test. Maybe, this would be the way their love would be remembered, as Iconic. No one knew what the future held but hope. Hope that the Ganga would truly bless them and save them from hell. Because if every Romeo had a Julliet, every Aman also deserved a Kartik.

~~~

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, the end was meant to be that way. Interpret your endings✌🏻


End file.
